DEFINING DOMESTIC ABUSE
By controlling money in a relationship, abusive partners prevent freedom. They may take earned money and not allow access to it, or watch over every penny. Preventing employment is also control.
Abusive partners may lie, threaten, intimidate, disrespect, and manipulate their partner. Verbal attacks are an abuser’s attempt to maintain control and may be an early sign of a rocky relationship.
Stalking isn’t just for ex’s. Some abusive partners monitor their partner’s every move. From phone trackers to hidden cameras to constant texts and calls, this behavior is another form of control.
Forcing sex, sabotaging birth control and physical violence during intercourse are ways of exerting control over a partner. Sexual exploits may serve as blackmail against the victim for seeking help.
Hacking into social media accounts, devices and email is a form of surveillance- and control. It communicates to the victim that she/he can’t have privacy or freedom. It also makes it hard to signal for help.
This is a non-verbal threat that if the abuser isn’t satisfied, there will be more pain and punishment. Intensity and frequency tends to increase over time. Healthy relationships don’t involve punishment.
Verbal and non-verbal threats of harm to others like family and friends keep victims afraid to seek help or leave. If recorded or witnessed, these threats may be useful in court against the abusive partner.
If the victim is dead, they can’t tell others about what’s been going on. Murder is the ultimate cover-up to a history of abusive and violent behavior. It’s also the most damaging for everyone involved.